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I decided to call Lap Of Love of the Triangle to come to the house rather than stress Eriana by making her take another car ride. I've used them in the past and they were great. My friend came over to be there with us. I got into the pet playpen with Eriana and she let me hold her for a bit.
The doctor came and told me what each injection did and what I could expect. I held my little girl and then she was gone. I cried so hard that the inside of my mask was....less than dry. So. Much. Snot. The vet let me stay with her for a while afterwards. She put Eriana in a beautiful basket with a blanket and I stroked her little face until I was ready for the vet to take her away.
I can't explain the depths of sadness I've had for this wonderful little cat child that has shared the last four years of her life with me. It's devastating that she had an underlying heart condition that I could do nothing about. But while she was here with me, she was loved and spoiled rotten.
Thinking I'm going to take a little time to process and mourn, and then I'll be back.